Babs wasn't happy, though. She didn't want me in her bed for sex, but she did like to cuddle up to me. This led to me staying out of her bed even more, to punish her for her treatment of me. She wouldn't give me what I needed, so why should I give in to her? We both began to sulk, to nag each other, and the marriage became cold.I like chatting on the internet, finding out the many different ways people think and behave. And my new sleep pattern gave me a lot of spare online time. Some of it I spent reading porn stories. We take our release where we can... Now and again I meet someone online who becomes a good friend. One of those people, Mary from Canada, did me a huge favour, by showing me what was wrong with my marriage. We started swapping mails at the end of 2003. I'm not sure what made me dump all my problems on to her. Certainly I had no thoughts that she could give me any answers - I'd given up believing that they existed. It was just good to be able to talk it through with. Your neighborhood is Irish, too, and the girls like you...But talking to them would waste a lot of time, you think. Your scarred-and-swollen arm pumps the iron in your hand in steady, ruthless bounds, a simple act that puts your abnormal strength and pain resistance on full display. Of course it hurts; your muscles ache and sting often, but you nourish your body well and expect exemplary results, so you haven't missed a workout in six years of grueling routine. The stronger you are, the easier you will be on yourself, you think...Your father wanted you to be this way: strong, cold, well-off and cunning. You're a part time pipe fitter at the chemical plants. It's hard, but at least you're handling the pipes before they get bathed in noxious miasma, and you're done before industrious poison ever starts coursing the pipework. College is easy, too, and you're an honor student...You think you find yourself in your hands, but know that's not the case; your features are sharp and masculine..
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