" She smiled. Only while flipping the switch on the kettle did I realize the play in words and I glanced back over to her to make sure. There was that sly little smile on Karmen's face that I'd come to know so well. I ignored it and kept my cool. After all, this meeting was so we could talk about what happened that night, to tell her it was a mistake and that it can never happen again. She was a married woman! "You sounded strange on the phone, Abel. Is everything okay?" "Sure, everything's fine." As soon as the words left my lips, I realized I was telling a lie. Everything was not fine. For two weeks I kept thinking of that night and each time, I felt more and more guilty. "Well, that's not entirely true," I added. I had rehearsed this conversation in my head a million times, played out all the scenarios and I needed to stick to my guns. I was going to tell her that it was a mistake. "I asked you to come over so we can talk about what happened." I put the mug down next to Karmen on. I learned a lot about the history of Africans, and the despicable things whites had done to them for many centuries. For Mara, having an African man's baby (or even many such c***dren) was the one, perfect solution to combating racism. As long as 'whites' had 'white' babies, and blacks had black babies, the races would forever be separated. There was no such thing as 'separate and equal' as far as Mara was concerned; and I agreed with her.Even before she and I were married, I already knew that Mara wasn't inclined to have yet another Caucasian baby. There were already more than enough of them in the world; which, in one way, was part of the perpetual problem of racism. So, the day Mara and I were married, I knew, even as we exchanged our vows, that none of the c***dren that would one day live under our roof were going to be 'mine', in the biological sense, but that of a strong African male. In fact, I knew that Mara was determined to have more than just one black c***d. She wanted.
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