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Pretending like this sexy gorgeous creature that turned her inside out was not in the same bar as her after weeks of thinking about her. She felt sort of stupid now, knowing who she was, that she could probably get any girl she wanted...she was just some chick she picked up in a bar. Probably some conquest. And here she was just staring at her, wishing for...to be in her arms again. Was she insane to want her? Cat hadn't approached her and she hadn't approached Cat. Scared of rejection...scared of her own reaction to her. She said goodbye to her friends, getting in her car. She had only two beers earlier in the night, not wanting to drink. Not wanting it to be a crutch so she would't have to deal with how she was feeling. And when she watched her drive away, she knew what she wanted. Even if she rejected her, she had to try. Because she knew this ache wouldn't go away regardless of how much she willed it to. She drove slowly, sorting out her thoughts. When she got there, she parked,. I got drunk so that I could go to bed with him. I never could have made myself do that if I was sober. I decided to let Kyle have me because I was angry but I had to get drunk so that I could go through with it.I was stunned. "I can't believe that you could have been that angry," I said. "I find it hard to believe that you would do something so stupid just because you were mad at me. Why didn't you talk to me about it instead of jumping into bed with a pathetic lounge lizard?" Don't you think I asked myself that same question over and over? I would never have believed that I was capable of doing anything so destructive," Kate said."Was the sex worth it? Did you enjoy it?" I said."God, no. I know I did it but I don't actually remember much of what happened once we got up to the room. Anyway, as soon as it was over I went into the bathroom and got extremely sick. I vaguely remember taking a shower and going to bed. When I woke up in the morning I was in the room by myself. That weasel.
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