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The story ends with the two main characters together anyway, we are just going to show that relationship not let the audience wonder ‘did they?”I looked at my co-star Toni; she looked perplexed and a little miffed “What are we going to do?” I asked her.She turned to Mike the producer, “I didn’t sign on for a sex scene, I agree with Dan, we don’t need to do it.”The director threw up his hands, “What the fuck is wrong with you two!? All you gotta do is strip to your underwear, crawl under a blanket and fumble around for a minute. The curtain falls, play over, you’re a big hit and on your way to Broadway. Give me a fucking break, you two sound like you’re both gay and don’t want to touch someone of the opposite sex!”I answered “There’s no chemistry, I don’t think I’d be convincing with her.”He looked at Toni, then me, “What the hell to you mean no chemistry? Look at her, she’s hot, she’s sexy, she’s a fucking blonde bombshell! Marilyn Monroe would envy her. Don’t you have any. )I am not a prude, and Clarissa was definitely worth the risks. But I started to balk at some of her more flamboyant ideas. Yes, I crawled under the table at my cousin Eddie's wedding and chewed Clarissa's cunt -- Eddie's mom never liked me anyway and she'd stuck me in the back of the hall with the bride's stepfather's second wife's nephews and two couples who vaguely remembered having known Eddie at some summer camp. And yes, Clarissa and I did do the horizontal rhumba on a gurney in an emergency room after she'd cut her leg slightly trying to climb out onto a rocky ledge overlooking the local monastery.But I drew the line at tit-fucking her in a rowboat at the park lagoon. (I tried to use the excuse that I can't swim, but she pointed out that the lagoon's only two feet deep.) And I absolutely refused to do a 69 in the glass elevator of our big local mall on the Friday after Thanksgiving."You're no fun anymore," Clarissa said with a frown. I was afraid I was losing her, and I wasn't.
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