The front room of the bigger house was the focal point for our sad reunion. I walked into the room searching for coffee and was greeted by the din from the gaggle of kids playing around the legs of the more tolerant adults. I scanned the room looking for the adult females feeling self-conscious as hell. My mother was there with her married sister and her daughter Betsy, one of my cousins.My younger sister Zoë saw me come in and grabbed a cup and filled it with life sustaining liquid from the coffee pot, wound her way through the kids and handed it to me. I thanked her then finished my inventory of female relatives. Missing from the room were my single aunt, one cousin and my uncle’s wife. That was three women, one of whom was probably taking a shower just then trying to wash away the shame of incest before she came face to face with me again. I ruled out the married aunt and concentrated on my mother’s unmarried sister and the cousin. My mothers youngest sister Carlene is just 6 years. Talk to me, Lyssa.”“I love you,” she said, and with those words opened up aworld of revelations for me. “I have for eight years.”Her head dropped and the tears flowed and I pulled herinto bed. We talked and hugged and shared our feelingsfor an hour before we both fell asleep. I knew she loved me, she wanted me, and I knew I wasscared of losing my dearest friend. And I confessed toher, too, all of that and how I just didn’t know whereto go with all of these emotions. She was so kind andgentle with me and listened and held me and let me sleepa deep, long, resting sleep. It didn’t seem to matterthat we were naked; it just made me feel closer.And now it was two nights later and I’d decided what todo.“Lyssa?” I asked, and she looked up from her rummagingthrough her purse. “What would you like for Christmas?”She gave me a small smile, started to say something, andthen laughed. “Oh, I don’t know. You know.
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